First time in years

For some reason the only thing I can do it smile, I've been smiling all day and I do not understand why. Well, I do know why, I'm feeling so good (if we look away from the tiny cold I have). My doctor said the chemo should kill the symptoms from the cancer (the once outside of chemo of course). And I'm so sure that they have, cause I haven't felt this good in so long, and I'm so confused cause I cant remember the last time I was fine. This is scaring the crap out of me, because wtf, for how long have I had cancer if I cant remember the last time I felt healthy??

I hate that is back to chemo on Tuesday, but at the same time I don't care. Because if feeling like this is what I can look forward to, I'm ecstatic. I couldn't be more happy, I feel so full of energy. It's stupid saying so, but I feel healthy (something I am obviously not). I'm so overwhelmed, it's almost like I've had it for years, there is no way of knowing anyways. But what I do know, I have at least had it for one, maybe closet to two years. That can also explain me not remembering feeling like this.

I feel so annoyed that I haven't pushed harder last year, all the times I went to the doctor and tried to get an answer for why I was feeling so shit all the time.

Let me have more of these days, I know it will be close to two weeks until next time.

My hair has been growing a tiny bit, I still stand on cutting it off was the best decision. Because I really don't see the point of taking care of hair that will most likely go. As always a new start is good, and I can't wait to be done with this treatment.

Going to the store in a bit, need to get some dinner for tonight, also getting a nice shop from the supermarket tomorrow, it's so nice being able to order groceries.

Time to get some University work done, before I'm feeling crap again. Helen.